ENJOY THE JOURNEY . . . It may end in a flash!

by Sam Reader

Compliments of S.G. Reader & Associates, Inc.

Saturday, April 5, 2008, would be one of those hallmarks – life changing days.  One might say it could have been the worst of days, while others would believe it was the best of days – depending on one’s attitude by the end of the day.  The best of times because it was the first time in approximately 18 months that we had all been together – hanging out as a family on an undemanding, go nowhere, have-nothing- to-do Saturday.  The worst of times because of our fate, which awaited us at 8:15 pm that evening.

The morning started out serendipitously with a beautiful bike ride around the Black Mountain and Boulders area and unexpectedly running into and watching the Cave Creek Rodeo Parade down Main Street by mid-morning.  As I look back on the morning and afternoon, I cannot help but wonder if my attitude towards things, events, and people would have been different knowing my life would possibly be coming to a close by evening.

I’m sure my wife and kids detected that I had heavier matters on my mind with my preoccupation to hurry up, cut events a little short, so I could get home and finish up some office work.

By knowing my date with destiny, would I have slowed down the bike ride and become more aware of the desert flowers in bloom and chatted a little longer during our water stops?  Looking back on those moments – I recall people waving and cheering from their parade floats, and my family waving and cheering back – but not me.  I suppose I had other thoughts on my mind, not allowing me to be present.

My most disturbing memory was a Girl Scout Troop walking along side the floats and handing out flyers to the spectators.  One of the girls walked over to me and asked if I wanted a flyer.  I politely said, “No, thank you”.  The rejection took this young girl by surprise – I believe I was her first and only rejection of the parade.  The look on her face was confusion and hurt.  It must have been obvious because my wife and son looked over at me in disbelief and asked what my problem was.  My son asked why I couldn’t have just taken the flyer!

I didn’t give much thought to that episode as the day moved forward.  I just knew I was in a hurry to get things done, and I was racing the clock so I could be at a meeting by 5:00 p.m.  I had prepared by wife and daughter to be ready for me to take them out for dinner at 7:00 p.m.  We were all excited with anticipation for the evening.

I could hardly wait – the time had arrived.  I rushed home only to find that the two of them had torn the garage apart and needed a little more time to clean, reorganize, and put it back together.  I was a little shocked.  I wasn’t expecting such a mess, and they weren’t ready for the great anticipated evening.  Furthermore, they wanted to go out and get more metal racks that evening for the garage.  I was dismayed over how the garage was trumping my evening; however, I learned a long time ago to pick my battles wisely with these two girls – particularly if they were together on a project.  I said nothing, but I’m sure it was spewing forth from my body language.  Picking up metal racks would mean taking the Land Cruiser, which translates into another 15 to 20 minutes to stop and fuel.  The evening was quickly fading.  None of this made sense to me

Again, knowing my date with destiny, would my attitude during these isolated moments when I hurried home to pick up the girls been different?  Would I have been more playful, less rushed or put out?

It was now approximately 8:05 p.m.  We had just finished having a quick and informal dinner at AJ’s – it’s not what I had in mind, but we had to get those metal racks.  The cashier checking us out is a fun and delightful person.  I always like going through her line.  She is seasoned in getting people to lighten up and laugh.  As usual, she was giving me a hard time again – I had eaten the food before paying for it.  While walking out to my car, I remember feeling how everything in the world seemed right.  Peaceful evening.  Great food. Beautiful wife and daughter.  Funny cashier.  I wonder if the cashier would have treated us any differently had she known we had a date with destiny in the next few moments.  I don’t see how she could have.  She treated us as if she did know!

8:10 p.m. We were heading south on Scottsdale Road.  The girls were feeling anxious about getting to the store to pick up the metal racks before it closed.  I mentioned to the girls that I wanted to take them for a treat at Whole Foods after we picked up the metal racks.  Again, we were excited – our evening was planned.  I had no reason to believe we couldn’t get our long awaited treat following the monotonous ordeal of picking up those metal racks.

8:15 p.m.  Still heading south on Scottsdale Road.  I’m in the right-hand lane driving 45 m.p.h.  Something caught my eye in the rear view mirror.  It looked as if an SUV passed a car directly behind me and started swerving out of control, approaching my rear quarter panel in seconds.  Just as I had the thought of easing over to the right to get out of the way, we were clipped.  The SUV had made impact on my rear wheel – driver’s side.  It pushed our car to the right.  Our car over-corrected and flipped on the passenger side, bouncing back up and flipping over on the roof.  The SUV somehow caught us again, made impact on the passenger side (while upside down) and pushing us another 60 feet towards oncoming traffic.

Although my mind blanked out during the flipping part of this ordeal, I do recall being pushed for what felt like an eternity of time.  Were we going into a ditch?  Hit a tree?  Or worse, get hit by another oncoming car?  I kept thinking how I didn’t want us to hurt.  In one flash, we were all living in absolute terror.

We finally came to a stop.  My daughter had the presence of mind to jump out and stop oncoming traffic.  In a few minutes, my wife was able to maneuver herself out of her seat and eventually find a way to recline my seat, as I was pinned behind the wheel.  We both quickly climbed out of all the debris through the back window, anticipating the car would ignite and blow up.  There was no screaming, yet there was something surreal about the quiet and slow motion experience of the process.  No broken bones – little to no bruising or blood – an absolute miracle.  We were alive!

In a matter of minutes there were many people to our rescue.  Even the person who had accidentally lost control of the SUV was okay and had come to assist.  The police and battalion chief were insistent that the Land Cruiser saved our lives – little did they know about the debate over the metal racks.  During all this high energy commotion with the police cars, fire department, ambulance, and bystanders watching on, I felt a great sense of gratitude.

My mind was suddenly drawn to the little Girl Scout during the parade.  Oh, how I wish I would have taken her flyer.

Monday morning was a new day with a new lease on life.  I received one of my regular faxes from a seller who is quite gifted in writing toxic notes – demanding updates, and so on.  One might agree that the demand notes border on the pensive, almost mean spirited side.  As I read the note, I chuckled.  Following my experience, it all seemed so insignificant and trite.  I called the client and relayed by Saturday night experience and the humor I found in reading the note.  The client agreed and felt embarrassed for sending it.

If you knew your date with destiny was at 8:15 p.m., would it change your attitude and feelings toward people and events of the day?  Would you find yourself being more patient, less hurried, a bit nicer/kinder, and less abrasive and rude, more compassionate, and less hard hearted?

One might ask, “What does any of this have to do with practice building?”  It’s a question you might not want to ask.  You could end up with an experience like me, and I would wish that on no one.

We are in the people business.  It has been my experience that the common denominator among the successful chiropractors is personality.  Assuming the doctor has above average technical skills, his/her personality seems to make the difference.  Much like the cashier, they enjoy the daily journey and it feels good to be around those people.  I have had my share of toxic doctors.  It is no coincidence that their patient referral base is weak and the ability to heal is frustrated.

As strange as this may sound and in a weird twist of fate, is it possible that what appeared to be the “worst of times” with meeting destiny at 8:15 p.m., could very well end up becoming the “best of times”?  Yes!  If it translates into enjoying the journey by making a difference for good – such as taking the little Girl Scout’s flyer, it will have become the “best of times”.

Be Grateful.  Be Smart.  Be Strong.  Be Helpful.  Enjoy!