THE HAVES vs. THE HAVE NOTS
By Sam Reader
Compliments of S.G.Reader & Associates Inc.
Not so long ago I visited Dr. A, who wanted his clinic listed for sale. The clinic itself was average in size and looks. The clinic was clean and organized, but not beautiful. The clinic was open 3 ½ days per week with annual collections of $475k.
Coincidentally, Dr. B, located approximately one mile down the road from Dr. A, also wanted to sell his clinic. Dr. B’s clinic was not only clean and organized − it was drop dead beautiful! It appeared that Dr. B had better visibility and accessibility over Dr. A’s location. Dr. B worked five days per week with annual collections of $165k.
How is it that both of these doctors attended the same school, graduated within a couple years apart, incorporated the same technique/practice philosophy, opened their clinics within six months from each other, and yet one doctor appeared to work harder each week than the other, with a financial reward of less than half?
Furthermore, Dr. B had invested $75k in leasehold improvements and truly had what appeared to be the winning hand for a successful practice location.
I have found this scenario all too common. A classic example of the “Haves vs. The Have Nots.” As I got to know the personalities of Dr. A and Dr. B, it became clear to me why the injustice existed between these two contemporaries. Both Dr.’s were above average in looks, height, health, and were close in age. So what was the obvious difference? Dr. A had a “can do” spirit and drive. Dr. B was negative.
Many years ago, I had the privilege of working with Dr. Shad Helmstetter, a behavioral researcher/motivational psychologist, and the best selling author of “What To Say When You Talk To Yourself.”
He broke down our Self Talk into four basic levels.
Level 1) Negative Acceptance. These are individuals who have developed a bad habit of saying, “I Can’t!” For example: “I can’t promote myself; I never was really good at marketing. This is why I became a doctor”. Bottom line. “I Can’t” translates into “I Won’t.”
Level 2) Recognition of Need to Change. These folks say, “I Should.” We call these people the “I Shoulder’s.” For example: “Yes, I know I should be more direct in my report of findings.” “I know I should promote my clinic.” “I know I should be a better manager.”
Dr. Helmstetter states that Levels 1 and 2 are the essence of external motivation. In other words, these folks are in constant need of external motivation – a dry sponge of kudos from others.
No coincidence that Levels 1 and 2 people are regular attendees of the self help/motivational seminars.
The fundamental problem of Levels 1 and 2 Self Talk? There isn’t enough horsepower or torque in the vocabulary to ignite the behavior, much less achieve long term goals.
Level 3) Decision to Change. These folks say, “I will.” For example: “I will learn how to promote myself.”
Level 4) Present Tense Vocabulary. These folks are in the habit of saying, “I am.” For example: “I am a good manager of people.” “My patients feel hope when I am clear and direct in my report of findings.” “I enjoy promoting and helping others.”
According to Dr. Helmstetter, Levels 3 and 4 Self Talk are the essence of internal motivation. In other words, motivation comes from within. Although these folks enjoy an occasional self help/motivational seminar, they are by no means regular attendees.
Being human, it is not uncommon to find ourselves bouncing in and out of all four levels, depending on the demands of the moment.
Our goal? Try to get into the habit of living in Levels 3 and 4 most of the time. If it feels awkward, that may be a sure sign that you are in need of change. According to the mind/brain researchers and neuro scientists, it can take up to 30-45 days to create a new synapse or thought process – so be patient!
Dr. B felt distraught about his situation. He knew he had spent so much more and worked harder than most, yet he felt he had so little. “Why should my neighbor have so much, when I have done all this and have so little?”
Dr. B was right! He did spend much and he worked hard. He just didn’t have the most important thing – good Self Talk.
Be Smart. Be Strong. Be Helpful. Enjoy!
